Stay connected while your child’s in the other parent’s care

After a divorce, it may be frustrating to see your child less. You and your ex-spouse may have bad blood between you, but you know that they’re a good parent and uphold your end of the custody agreement. You still worry, though, and wish you could see your child more often.

One way to help parents and children cope with the changes that occur after divorce is by opening up more lines of communication. Being physically present with one another is not the only way to interact. Here are three virtual visitation options you can use to improve communication, so that you and your child can feel more at ease when you are apart.

1. Try using a messaging service

The first thing you should try is using a messaging service. Consider giving your child a phone or other digital device that they can take between homes. Whether it’s a chat server they can use when they’re on their computer, the ability to speak with you through a video game or a simple messaging service, having the ability to communicate and send messages can make you and your child feel more comfortable when you’re apart.

2. Use a video call to keep up routines

For some children, not having one parent there at night is a real frustration and cause of distress. That’s why video calls are so beneficial. A parent who always reads a bedtime story or who helps with homework can be “on call” for an hour or two a day to continue doing that via computer. This is a good way for you to be present without having to physically be in your ex-spouse’s home or to be present during their custody time.

3. Set times for quick calls for checking in

For children and parents who just want to check in, a quick phone call does the trick. It’s good to allow your child to call and stay in contact with the other parent when they’re with you and vice versa, so long as it is not interfering with your time. For example, if your child wants to give a quick call to dad before bed, that’s totally normal and something you may be happy to allow.

These are three ways that you can improve communication and help your child feel comfortable after divorce. You and your ex-spouse can decide if these kinds of communication are right for your situation.